What do you write about?

I find the question of how do I figure out what to write about is asked by someone who does not write (or at least does not write this style of blog). It is similar to if someone were to ask you how do you find books to read? If you read books, you would know. And if you have to ask…well, perhaps you will never know.

When I ~sometimes tell people that I maintain a ~daily blog, I generally get the same reaction (I would say that I used to tell people this MORE often—back in v1 of my blogging days but that is besides the point). Generally, when I tell people that I write, they respond with: “oh, cool. How do you figure out what to write about? I feel like it would be hard to come up with ideas.”

This question has never sat particularly well with me. Not because it is a mean or rude question but rather because I do not have a particularly complex? answer. And beyond that—it is silly. I have so many things to write about. Truly, infinite. I will never run out of ideas around what to write about. Truly, never. I could keep this up forever (so long as I want to). Just as I really do have infinite books I need to and want to read (the list could take me many lifetime). Something sad, and happy about that.

My answer as to how I pick what to write about is (as I will describe in this essay) honestly quite simple. Boringly simple

I sit down. I set a 15 minute timer (at home, I have a physical digital timer. Otherwise, I use Google timers). I play background instrumental music (either instrumental trap beats or lofi or jazz music).

And then I pull up this blank canvas—stare at the cursor for about 15 seconds, and then start typing. And that is the process, until I hit publish about 15-30 minutes later.

The first few minutes are generally pushing the rock up the hill—I have an idea of what I want to write about but I have no idea the shape or form the essay is going to take. It is a lot of meandering and rejiggering thoughts in my head before they start to flow. It is kind of hard and discouraging sometimes. But I have gotten a lot better at it. Eventually, the ideas start to come.

But once they flow, well then, they really start to flow.

The first part of the process is like climbing a mountain. The second part is like racing downhill. By the time you get to the top—your thoughts WANT to get out. The limiting factor is really how fast your hands can type them out (as an aside, my ~normal typing speed, when just copying something, is around 120 words per minute. My speed when writing one of these essays, on average, is something like 70 words per minute. So it really is rather close to stream of conscious style writing, as is probably quite obvious if you have bopped around 1 or 2 of the pages on this site).

By the time I sit down to write, though, the essays are already in my head. The legos of them are at least. The writing the essay part is just FINDING connections across the legos so that, by the time the essay comes together, it is legible and at least has the shape of something digestible (and in rare cases, it comes out looking like a masterpiece).

When you have a blog, something changes about how you process thoughts WHEN YOU ARE NOT BLOGGING.

It is kind of like working out. Or at least something someone told me about working out. Which is that your muscle gains come when you are NOT lifting weights. Put another way, when you are lifting weights, you are tearing up your muscles. When you are not at the gym, that is when the muscles actually form.

Blogging is kind? of like this—so long as you squint and accept the analogy.

When I am blogging, I am finding linkages in my brain. But when I am not writing—in the off-hours, that is when my brain is storing ideas and actually coming up with the raw legos.

So when people ask me what I write about, my honest answer is EVERYTHING. There are no rules. The only rule of this blog is that I am going to write 1 million words. Everything else I can write about, and that is ~basically what i intend to do. (Now, for what it’s worth, I do many other types of writing, this is just one home where I can let my thoughts flow extremely freely).

If you do read this blog—I think you could find common themes. I am actually going to run a linguistics analyzer on all this content to see if I can find themes/learn from it. The themes ebb and flow over time but definitely you will find many of the essays have lots in common with one another and you can see how they are being written by the same person EXPERIENCING THE SAME PART OF LIFE.

I generally write about my experience of the world and observations I have made (or am trying to figure out) across relationships, interpersonal dynamics, thinking, and awareness. At least right now.

Perhaps this blog (and the shape of my thoughts) will change as I change. I would bet on that. I would bet on this blog taking on different themes as the aspects of my life evolve. This blog is really a mirror. Or a magnifying glass. A peak into HOW I think. This is the best I can do—is deliver raw stream of conscious thoughts. So you can see how my brain really processes.

But the truth is I am not writing for you. I am writing for me. And if you do not like that, I encourage you to not read!