seriously and your health

All I keep thinking about these days is just how being serious about something is really how you win at life. Yeah you can get lucky. But the alpha. The thing that really matters above all else – the thing that really summarizes the differences in my head between good and great. The thing that maters. I also think a lot about how it’s hard to get other people to be serious. I mean it starts with you. You can write essays telling people to be serious but like what does that do. I think the only thing that really gets other people motivated to take action and be more serious is to actually just lead by example. And have them work with you and that. Working harder — really just more seriously — is contagious and really can spread within an organization.

Totally going to switch gears here. I hope it connects but my mind shifted. I hurt my foot last week. Not sure how. But I think it’s a stress fracture. I went to the doctor and they were of no help really – they were not sure what it was. Said could be a gout attack or a stress fracture. And to take ib profen or however you spell it. lol. Anyways. I have not left the house in days. I have not worked out in days for the first time in months. And I feel like I’m teetering spiraling. I’m not spiraling. My mental is okay. It’s not that bad. But being alone inside all the time – yeah, I feel demotivated. I feel like I could lose my mojo. Feel like I could break.

The mind body connection is underratedly really influential in my life and probably yours the readers too. And I’m just aware that when I don’t have movement, I feel less capable and less motivated. Though, I’m trying to find ways to turn this into a good thing for me somehow but I just can’t see that. I’m in pain. I can’t move. And i”m worried that i’m going to get fat if I’m being honest. It’s a new type of test. I want to be running and lifting weights. But whatever. Hopefully it’s not a long term injury. Because damn this sucks. This may ruin my whole summer plans. All the exploring I wanted to do. In europe and london and beyond. But this is just the beginning perhaps. I can figure this out.

That’s what I tell myself at least. It came out of nowhere. Another reminder that your health is everything, but also nothing. It’s everything until it’s nothing. Because idk in a few months or whenever this is behind me – I will lose the empathy for me. At some point. I will forget. I will forget how much this just sucks. So badly. To be alone. To be locked up like this.

I hope I don’t forget. I need to use this as fuel. As something to motivate me further. To be serious. That’s the point of adversity. At least one point. It’s useful. It’s hard to see in the moment. But it helps. It helps you go. It helps you figure out how to spend your life. Because when things suck, then things can be great. You can’t just always have it great. Now as for this injury – it literally came out of nowhere. Not a single event caused it.

And so now…well now I’m hungry. Hungry to get back to peak. I need to take this seriously. I need to take my health more seriously. I mean I already do in ways. But I need to recover seriously. I need to break out of this. I want to be able to do things again. Soon.

So I booked doctor’s appointment in AM. I am going to get through this.


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