blast radius

How big is your blast radius? In other words, if everything in your life were to fall apart — if you were to break everything and things blow up — who would be impacted? How many people? I guess it’s a tricky exercise because is the life of one person inherently less valuable than say 100 people in your orbit? But I think you get the point in terms of comparing magnitudes.

If you are in a position in your life where a lot of people depend upon you – or at least are influenced or impacted by you in some material (or even non material) capacity, then how much do you feel that weight of responsibility and how do you let it impact how you actually go about making decisions.

That latter point is what scares me quite a bit. Scares me in that I am afraid of making decisions to satisfy this constraint of me getting older and the people around me depending on me.

That comes across extremely selfish. Maybe it is. Maybe it’s that I don’t want to sacrifice my decision making for other people. And maybe I realize that. And maybe writing this is making it more and more pronounced. But maybe I need to grow up and start taking my blast radius into account more often.

Because right now, when I wake up – I mean most of my decisions are made for me. In my head at least, no one really depends upon me. I mean far less than before. Before, well before I had people working for me. I probably overestimate and underestimate my blast radius at times.

Though, there is something freeing about that number being 1. Just myself. Something freeing about the decisions it leads to.

I think a lot of people when I look at their decisions, I think I underestimate the degree to which they are not actually thinking for themselves. And it’s not because of my original hypothesis. It’s more because perhaps they are thinking more about other people.

Maybe.


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